Quotes Funny New Year Wishes: Hilarious Sayings & Greetings

Another year gone, just like that! Anyone else feel like they blinked and suddenly it’s January again? And with the new year comes the inevitable pressure of resolutions, fresh starts, and all that jazz. But let’s be real, who actually sticks to those things beyond, like, the second week of January? It’s all a bit much, isn’t it?

So, what do we do? We could pretend we’re super organized and have our entire year planned out. We could make promises we know we can’t keep. Or… we could just laugh! All that pressure to be perfect, to magically transform into a better version of ourselves overnight… it’s exhausting! And honestly, sometimes the best way to deal with it all is to just throw our hands up and find the humor in the chaos. Let’s face it, another year probably means another year of hilarious mishaps, awkward encounters, and general life-being-life moments.

Instead of stressing about what we *should* be doing, how about we start the year with a chuckle? I’ve compiled a list of funny New Year’s wishes that are guaranteed to bring a smile to your face (and maybe even a snort or two). Forget the overly sentimental stuff – let’s embrace the absurdity and kick off the new year with a healthy dose of laughter. Ready to see some funny quotes?

Humorous New Year Resolutions Quotes

New Year’s resolutions often feel like promises we make to ourselves, knowing deep down we might break them by February! Injecting humor into these resolutions can make the process a lot more enjoyable, and perhaps even a little more sustainable. Here are some funny quotes to lighten the mood and bring a smile to your face as you contemplate the year ahead.

  • My New Year’s resolution is to tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time.
  • This year, I resolved to make a change… so I’m changing the channel.
  • My New Year’s resolution is 1080p.
  • I’m going on a whiskey diet. I’ve already lost three days.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to stop pretending that I like everyone.
  • This year, I plan to make fewer resolutions so I won’t feel so bad when I break them.
  • New Year’s resolution: Stop saying “yes” to things I don’t want to do. (Starting January 2nd.)
  • I’m resolving to be more spontaneous this year. Or not.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to lose weight, but I hate losing. So my plan is to just not win.
  • This year, I’m going to try to be less awesome… but I’m having trouble figuring out how.
  • New Year’s resolution: Actually use the gym membership I’m paying for. (Maybe.)
  • I’ve decided to stop using Google for everything. I’m going to start asking my mom.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to stay positive, even when dealing with annoying people. Or I might just avoid them altogether.
  • This year, I resolve to spend less money… unless it’s on something I really want.
  • New Year’s resolution: To remember to put the garbage out on Tuesdays. (Setting a low bar for success.)

These humorous quotes remind us that it’s okay to not take everything so seriously. The new year is a chance for a fresh start, but it’s also an opportunity to laugh at ourselves and the often-unrealistic expectations we set.

So, as you craft your New Year’s resolutions, remember to sprinkle in some humor. It can make the journey a lot more enjoyable and might even help you stick to those goals a little bit longer. Happy New Year!

Funny New Year’s Eve Party Sayings

New Year’s Eve parties are all about celebrating, laughing, and making memories. Injecting some humor into your New Year’s Eve greetings can lighten the mood and bring smiles to everyone’s faces. Here are some funny sayings perfect for sharing at your New Year’s Eve party.

  • May your New Year’s resolution be to tolerate me more.
  • I’m ready for my New Year’s Eve blooper reel.
  • New Year’s Eve: where we all pretend we’re going to fix our lives in the next 365 days.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating… I’ll start tomorrow.
  • Happy New Year! Let’s all make the same mistakes, just in different ways.
  • I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person.
  • New Year’s Eve is the only time I have any friends.
  • Save water, drink champagne! Happy New Year!
  • I’m not sure what’s tighter, my pants after all the holiday food or my budget after New Year’s.
  • May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.
  • Happy New Year! I hope you survive all the relatives.
  • This year, I’m making no resolutions. The habit of breaking them is too hard to kick.
  • New Year’s resolution: Drink more water… and more wine.
  • Cheers to another year of questioning all my life choices!
  • May your hair, teeth, face-lift, abs all hold up this New Year!

These sayings are perfect for toasts, social media captions, or even just a funny comment to share with friends and family. Remember, laughter is the best way to start a new year!

So, go ahead and spread the joy! Use these funny sayings to add some humor to your New Year’s Eve celebrations and make this year’s party the most memorable one yet. Happy New Year!

Lighthearted New Year’s Greetings for Friends

New Year’s is the perfect time to send some love and laughter to your friends! A funny and lighthearted message can brighten their day and kick off the year with a smile. These greetings are designed to be relatable, silly, and full of good cheer – perfect for sharing with your favorite people.

  • Happy New Year! Let’s hope this year our biggest problem is deciding which filter to use on our photos.
  • May your New Year be filled with as much happiness as you find when you finally take off your bra after a long day!
  • Happy New Year! I can’t wait to make more memories with you… even if some of them are a little blurry.
  • Wishing you a Happy New Year! Let’s resolve to be even more ridiculous and have even more fun than last year.
  • Happy New Year, friend! Let’s hope we both manage to adult a little better this year… but probably not.
  • May your New Year’s resolutions last longer than your gym membership! Happy New Year!
  • Happy New Year! Here’s to another year of laughing at our own jokes and keeping each other sane.
  • Wishing you a New Year filled with good health, good times, and questionable decisions that make great stories!
  • Happy New Year! Thanks for being the friend who knows all my embarrassing stories and still loves me anyway.
  • May your New Year be as bright and sparkly as my New Year’s Eve outfit (even though I stayed home in pajamas).
  • Happy New Year! Let’s face it, we’re too old to go clubbing, so let’s just eat snacks and watch movies.
  • Wishing you a Happy New Year! May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short.
  • Happy New Year! I’m so glad we’re weird together. Let’s keep it up in the new year!
  • May your New Year’s diet consist mainly of cake and good intentions. Happy New Year!
  • Happy New Year! Let’s celebrate surviving another year of adulting with copious amounts of [insert your favorite treat].

These messages are just a starting point, feel free to personalize them to reflect your unique friendship. Add an inside joke, a shared memory, or a funny observation to make it even more special.

No matter what, remember that the best New Year’s wishes come from the heart. A simple, heartfelt message filled with laughter and good vibes is sure to make your friends feel loved and appreciated as they start the new year.

Witty New Year’s Toasts and Cheers

Raise your glasses high and let the laughter flow! New Year’s Eve is the perfect time to share a witty toast with friends and family. These aren’t your grandma’s polite pronouncements; these are funny, lighthearted cheers designed to bring a smile to everyone’s face as you welcome the new year.

  • May your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions!
  • To the New Year: May it be less like 2023 and more like we imagined 2020 would be.
  • Here’s to another year of questionable decisions that we’ll laugh about… eventually.
  • May this year be the year you actually use that gym membership. Cheers!
  • To the New Year: May we know them, may we be them, may we raise them.
  • Let’s drink to the New Year! May we all be as happy as we pretend to be on social media.
  • To a new year and another chance to get it right… or at least not mess it up quite as badly.
  • May all your problems last as long as your New Year’s resolutions!
  • Here’s to being miserable for another year, but at least we’re together! Happy New Year!
  • Cheers to the New Year. A fresh year, a fresh start, and potentially the same old mistakes!
  • May your hair, your teeth, your face-lift, your abs, not fall, drop, sag, drag, or decentralize. Here’s to the New Year!
  • Let us welcome the New Year with open arms and slightly lowered expectations.
  • Here’s to the New Year, full of new experiences, new opportunities, and the same old me.
  • May the New Year bring us closer to our goals… or at least closer to the fridge.
  • To the New Year: May it be slightly less chaotic than the last one… but not too boring!

These witty toasts and cheers are sure to be a hit at any New Year’s Eve gathering. They’re a fun way to acknowledge the past year while looking forward to the future with a sense of humor.

Remember to personalize these to your own experiences and inside jokes with your friends and family for an even bigger laugh. Have a happy and hilarious New Year!

Sarcastic New Year’s Eve Quotes

Let’s face it, sometimes a little bit of sarcasm is the perfect way to ring in the New Year. If you’re looking for a humorous way to express your New Year’s sentiments, these sarcastic quotes are sure to bring a smile (or at least a smirk) to your face. They are perfect for sharing with friends who appreciate a good dose of witty cynicism.

  • New Year’s resolution: Tolerate you all a little bit better.
  • I’m not saying I’m going to change this year, but I might accidentally improve slightly.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to stop pretending that I like everyone.
  • May your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.
  • Happy New Year! Here’s to another year of questionable decisions.
  • I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person.
  • New Year’s Eve: where we all get dressed up to go somewhere and be just as miserable as we are every other night.
  • My New Year’s resolution is 1080p.
  • This year, I plan to be more decisive… maybe.
  • Happy New Year! Time to make a whole new set of mistakes.
  • New Year’s resolution: Avoid all the resolutions I made last year.
  • Here’s to another year of trying to get my life together. Spoiler alert: I probably won’t.
  • May all your troubles last only as long as your New Year’s resolutions.
  • I’m so excited for next year. I’ll be using the same planner as this year, just changing the dates.
  • Happy New Year! Let’s get ready to awkwardly write the wrong year on everything for the next three months.

Sarcasm can be a fun way to acknowledge the often unrealistic expectations we place on ourselves at the start of a new year. These quotes are a lighthearted way to connect with others who share a similar sense of humor about the ups and downs of life.

So, go ahead and spread some sarcastic cheer this New Year’s Eve! Just remember to keep it light and friendly, and make sure your audience knows you’re joking. Happy New Year, and may your sarcasm always be on point!

Playful New Year Wishes for Family

Family is where life begins and love never ends. So, why not kick off the New Year with a sprinkle of laughter and lightheartedness? These playful wishes are designed to bring a smile to your family’s faces and set the tone for a year filled with joy and togetherness. After all, what’s better than starting the year with a shared giggle?

  • Happy New Year! May your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions!
  • Wishing you a Happy New Year filled with less drama than my reality TV obsession!
  • Happy New Year! Let’s hope this year we actually use our gym memberships.
  • May this New Year bring you more happiness than finding extra fries at the bottom of the bag! Happy New Year!
  • Happy New Year! Remember, diet starts tomorrow…again!
  • Wishing you a year filled with 365 days of laughter, except for when you’re trying to assemble IKEA furniture. Happy New Year!
  • Happy New Year! May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short!
  • Happy New Year to the family that’s more dysfunctional than a broken remote, but I love you anyway!
  • Wishing you a New Year as bright as my future…after my first cup of coffee!
  • Happy New Year! Let’s make this year legen…wait for it…dary! (Dad jokes are mandatory).
  • To my amazing family, Happy New Year! May our Wi-Fi be strong and our arguments be few!
  • Happy New Year! May your bank account be as full as my stomach after Christmas dinner!
  • Wishing you a Happy New Year! Let’s try to be on our best behavior… until at least January 2nd.
  • Happy New Year! May your selfies be flawless and your filters be strong!
  • Happy New Year! May all your clothes fit and your coffee always be hot!

These playful wishes are just a starting point, feel free to adapt them to your family’s unique sense of humor. Adding a personal touch will make them even more special and memorable, ensuring a cheerful start to the New Year.

Remember, the best gifts are often the simplest gestures. A funny quote, a heartfelt wish, or a silly memory shared can brighten someone’s day and strengthen the bonds that tie you together. So, go ahead, spread some laughter and make this New Year unforgettable for your family!

New Year’s Funny Quotes about Hangovers

Let’s be honest, sometimes the best part of New Year’s Eve is the promise of a fresh start, and the worst part is the potential for a killer hangover the next day! Here are some funny quotes to share with your friends who might be struggling on January 1st, or to simply bring a little levity to the post-celebration recovery.

  • My New Year’s resolution is to stop saying “yes” to more alcohol. Starting tomorrow, of course.
  • May your New Year be filled with less regret than your New Year’s Eve.
  • I’m not sure what’s tighter, my jeans or my head after last night. Happy New Year!
  • New Year’s resolution: Drink more water. And by water, I mean mimosas.
  • Happy New Year! Remember: The hangover only lasts a day, but the memories last a lifetime. (Hopefully!)
  • I’m ready for 365 new days of potential hangovers. Happy New Year!
  • My brain has more bubbles than the champagne I drank last night. Happy New Year!
  • New Year’s resolution: Learn from last year. Also, find out where I parked my car.
  • Out with the old, in with the new. May your troubles be less and your hangover be gone by noon!
  • I love New Year’s Eve. It’s the one night I can wear sequins and blame my headache on the champagne.
  • Happy New Year! Let’s all hope our memories from last night come back soon…or not.
  • Warning: May cause excessive celebration followed by a day of regret. Happy New Year!
  • My New Year’s resolution is to handle my hangovers with more grace. (And maybe drink less).
  • A New Year’s toast: To blurry nights, questionable decisions, and even funnier stories to tell later.
  • Happy New Year! May your coffee be strong and your Advil be stronger.

These quotes are meant to be lighthearted and fun. Remember to drink responsibly and take care of yourself on New Year’s Eve. The most important thing is to celebrate with loved ones and enjoy the start of a new year.

Whether you’re nursing a hangover or feeling refreshed, we hope these funny quotes brought a smile to your face. Happy New Year, and may your year be filled with laughter and joy!

Happy New Year, Folks!

Well, there you have it! Hopefully, you’ve found the perfect funny New Year’s wish to share with your friends and family. Remember, a good laugh is a fantastic way to kick off the new year and spread some joy. Don’t be afraid to get creative and tailor those quotes to your own unique style and relationships. Cheers to a year filled with happiness, health, and plenty of hilarious moments!

Thanks for reading, and we hope you enjoyed these witty nuggets of wisdom (or, well, silliness!). We’re always adding fresh content, so be sure to check back soon for more laughs, tips, and inspiration. From all of us, have a truly spectacular New Year filled with all things awesome!